Born to Rise
“You have a gathering of women behind you. Hundreds of ancient women standing behind you. Arms outstretched, hands touching your shoulders. You are supported by them. Their heads are bowed in reverence and gentle genuflection for the role you are accepting. Your lineage: hundreds of women, natural healers who never stepped into their gifts or refused them outright. Hundreds of women who were called to do exactly what you are accepting, but out of fear and persecution, refused and snuffed out their light. They are in awe. They are standing behind you, supporting you and guiding you. These ancient healers will now work through you to deliver miraculous healing of spirit to whomever you work with. This is the gift they are delivering through you. Through you to all. You must share this with as many people as possible.”
There I stood, in the familiar space of my Light Worker and Healer, a room I had been in several times before, surrounded by light purple walls and brilliant sunlight. Cabinets and a counter in front of me featured an organized line of spiritual books, each one with a colorful spine and interesting title to draw my attention. I stare at these books so as to not cry and dissolve into my fear. There’s a picture of an angel rising into a burst of light - a picture that brings me particular comfort every time I am in its presence. Behind me is a massage bed - it doubles as her desk and solid structure in my auric field to provide support and steady place to land if my legs give out. And on this day, I am grateful for its presence, because in humbled awe, I crumbled and sat on the bed. This was not what I had expected for my session. Who would ever have expected that kind of immense blessing?
I was simultaneously crushed and elated. Crushed under the enormity of responsibility that was laid out before me. Crushed under the humility of being chosen for such a blessing. Crushed by the generosity of my elders to teach, guide and work through me. Crushed…and yet, elated for all the same reasons. In a whirlwind of confusion and emotion, conflicting thoughts rushed through my brain. Who am I to receive such a gift? Who am I to refuse such a gift? I felt an overwhelming need to kneel on the ground and lower my head to the floor. For what felt like an eternity but passed in minutes, I vacillated between the feelings of not being worthy and humbled grace. With shallow breath, I sat and cried as decades of confusion and grief flowed out of me on the cleansing trail of tears. Feeling the strength of the Souls who had gathered to anoint me, I settled and, with the entirety of my being, I accepted my role as Healer.
It was most definitely a conscious effort to accept this role. It took strength, fortitude and faith to step into this ascended title. For years, I had lived in active rejection of the word “Healer.” I scoffed at those who even hinted at it. I told myself I was just really good at my job. I was a loving, caring, and talented Gyrotonic Instructor. For close to two decades, I had used The Gyrotonic Method® to help people with their physical ailments, guided them through the spiraling exercises to open their tissue and expand their spines to invite healing and peace into their bodies and minds. I had gained a reputation for being able to intuitively know exactly what a client needs to make a full recovery, and clients have stayed with me for years because of that mysterious feeling of wonder that takes place every week. But no, I’d insist, I was no Healer. It was enough to force myself to admit I was just really good at what I did. “Healer”, a word that struck at my stomach and made me lurch. A word that produced panic and terror in every cell of my body. The fear of being known, having my name spoken on the lips of others, fear of being seen and losing my ability to hide in plain sight. No, “Healer” was a title reserved for the special few, the blessed, people who create miracles and are chosen by God…right? An over used word that made people magical and separate from others. A word that elevates someone, shines a light on them and draws attention. That wasn’t me, who was I to declare myself better than others or, heaven forbid…special?
For my entire life, I had lived in a place of a repeated monologue summed up in one sentence.
You’re not special.
I lived in those words for the majority of my life. Embodied the concept of staying small, remaining hidden, head down, eyes forward, and being quiet. You are not special. I infused those words into the fiber of my being, and the fabric of my soul, so deep the very concept kept me comforted in a twisted delusional way. If I’m not special, no one sees me. If no one sees me, I can’t be judged. If I can’t be judged, I can’t be told I’m wrong or less than. And if no one can say I’m less than, they can’t prove me right…that I am truly not special. Around and around, for close to 50 years, I lived in that circular argument - simultaneously running from and embracing the fear of not being special. Constantly chasing the safety and solitude of mediocrity. You are not special.
The problem with running in a circle is you only ever run from yourself. And you know what else? You only ever catch yourself too.
That’s where I found myself that spring day. I had run full circle, away from and towards ME. Me, my soul, my truest self - the beginning and the end of a struggle and race I hadn’t even realized I had been running. But in the safety of this healing space, a light shined into the darkest of shadows to force me to genuflect in reverence to my own worth, I dropped to my knees and released my internal struggle with worthiness, ego, and fear. Layer by layer my soul tore away at the doubt. If I accept the title of Healer, what will others think? If I call myself a Healer, what does that say about who I think I am? If I tell the world, what if I can’t deliver? I wallowed in the inner turmoil that every person faces as they stand at the entrance of their own gates to heaven. What if I walk through?
On shaking legs, I rose off the floor. Through closed eyes,, I could sense the enormous gateway before me, the entrance into a new existence. All of my senses lit up as I took in the enormity of what stood before me. I felt a spark of strength as I covered my eyes with my hands, an involuntary act of humility and grace.Standing before my own personal portal, I said yes and stepped through. Emboldened with purpose and supported by a power I had never before experienced, tears streamed down my face as I took a deep breath and lowered my hands from my eyes. In perfect timing, light shone through the window and I felt the warmth of divine love drench over me in a holy ritual. I accepted the title of Healer and felt a crown placed upon my head. Immediately, I was filled with the gratitude of every woman in my lineage—every Healer that was ever denied or forced to retreat from their natural abilities. Out of our collective fear, I was healed. Birthed from their courage, a mixture of gratitude and purpose, I stepped into my new role and somehow intuited the contract I was enacting. Though I had signed it lifetimes ago, in that moment of affirmation, it activated. A contract of love, purpose and servitude. A Soul Contract to help others heal and find their way back to their soul’s purpose. My contract - written at the creation of my soul, agreed to upon my incarnation and enacted through the embrace of my role as a Healer. An almost indescribable level of pride and acceptance, a quiet inner knowing that provided the assuredness to calmly step through the gates of my heaven and into my role as a healer on earth. There is peace here. There is deep solitude in knowing and embracing your soul’s purpose. I walked through and found myself defined, whole and worthy of divine understanding and direction.
My guides were kind, gentle and patient as I learned how to raise my vibration and open myself to their knowledge and guidance. Sessions with clients were altered completely. New energies showed up to perform healings in real-time. Ancient Healers moved through me with surgical precision to help remove energy and prevent future disease. They guided me through the removal of trauma to heal present day pain. I opened to their guidance with complete trust. With the acceptance of faith my fear of being seen and valued was obliterated. My doubt was erased as there was no room within me for these emotions or worries as I was shown in each moment that every question had an answer and, if I allowed for it, guidance would lead me to serving someone in the best ways possible. There was not a trace of self doubt left as I leaned into the support that was given to me by my team of ancient Healers. With their example and expertise, my confidence grew as I was shown exactly how physical pain and disease are birthed from the energy of trauma. They taught me that emotional pain is the seed from which the plant of fear roots and grows. Fear then metastasizes, growing into the manifestation of disease and ailment that deteriorate the human form. Client after client, I was shown how to experience the energy of fear and trauma to alleviate future ailment. Every day, I share in the energy of miracles and help others to release their fear so that they may find themselves at the entrance of their own gate and have the courage to walk through.
This is my life, a never-ending learning experience, and I love it. I am no longer wandering in a state of self doubt, living in fear of being “discovered”. I’m not hiding from my true self or wearing masks to be accepted. I speak my truth, express my needs and am empowered by my authenticity. My relationships are supportive and nurturing because I am able to speak to my needs. My life is in alignment with my soul’s purpose and every day is filled with adventure, peace, and growth. I couldn’t be more grateful or in more awe for how much I have changed. I observe myself now and am proud of who I am and how I live in service not just to others, but to myself and to a life that is in complete celebration of Me.
So I ask you, Why have you come here? Why are you reading this? Are you ready to walk through your doubt, release your fear and heal your trauma so that you too may discover your Soul’s Purpose? Are you ready to embrace you? And I mean fully, wholly, the light and the shadow, are you ready to embrace your truest self?
Who are you? What is your purpose? Share yourself with the world as I share myself with you.
I am Lisa: wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, and Healer.
BIO
For nearly 15 years, Lisa has been guiding individuals toward deep healing through a powerful blend of holistic modalities. As a Feng Shui Expert, Reiki Master Teacher, Medical Intuitive, and Channeler for Transformative Meditations, she excels at harmonizing energy. She is proud to be the Founder of Nagare Life, where she inspires others to embrace INTENTIONAL LIVING.
BODY • MIND • SOUL • SPACE
She hosts the podcast, FIND YOUR FLOW, which features Reiki-infused channeled meditations to inspire growth, life stories to empower listeners on their own healing journeys, and conversations with guests to explore spiritual and self-care practices.
Lisa is also a contributing author of two books:
The Energy Medicine Solution and Born to Rise
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